it's a mom thing

There is a baby explosion in the office where I work. Several young women, mostly newlyweds, are pregnant with their first babies. When I come across one of them in the hallway or lunchroom I'm struck speechless by the warm glow that surrounds them. Seeing the joy in their faces reminds me of the excitement of feeling that first flutter, the boisterious kicking just as I lay down to sleep, the gentleness with which my husband and I made love during the last trimester. It was a beautiful time.

Now having been a parent for over 18 years I see and feel things that are impossible to experience when you're filled with the joy of new life. I literally ache when I see the new moms in the office, and find myself at a loss for words when talking with them. I want so badly to tell them to hold their babies as much as possible, to research the teachers in their children's school, and make requests for which teacher their child has each year. I want to tell the young moms to search their teenager's backpack in middle school, and to have their kids' friends over to their own house, instead of allowing their teen to spend the night elsewhere. To get training in drug awareness, and to familiarize themselves with the counselors in their child's high school.

But most of all, I want to tell them that sometimes, even when you've done the best you can, there may be serious problems that children will have. That you may experience a great amount of guilt, but it's not productive. What is productive is love, consistent guidance and honesty. Always be honest. With your children, and with yourself.

You can't always be the good guy. But you can always hope, and pray, and love those dear children. They are our future, and they are shaped by our past. So Happy Mother's Day, to all of you parents. It truly is the toughest job there is--and I wouldn't trade it for anything.